~:[CH2 - Day 59]:~ Anything Bot Relaxing

~:[CH2 - Day 59]:~ Anything Bot Relaxing

I guess there is no better way to what felt like the busiest month ever than to have the busiest day ever. With our first meet of the season (inter-squad) and preparing for Nationals, my "prep" periods were filled with serious work. Printing maps, passports, itineraries, rooming lists, making buttons, printing meet paperwork, updating rosters ... the list goes on ... the morning was just crazy like a man is trying to get air in a sea of sharks, but doesn't know how to swim. Yeah, something like that :). In any case, with jumping from point to point, I finally got it all completed, ran a successful meet forgetting a few things, but not as much as you may have thought, and even had enough time to catch a quick dinner at Sweetie Thai. After doing so, I changed and headed out to our music video shoot. I won't go into specifics since they'll be working on the video soon, but while fun, it was completely exhausting with everyone dead by the time we left the set at about 3am. After the drive home, I jumped into bed, with March already upon me.

~:[CH2 - Day 58]:~ Acts of Kindness

~:[CH2 - Day 58]:~ Acts of Kindness

Would it be weird to get a call or a text just asking where you were with someone showing up with a nice treat for you? Well it happened to me and it really helped make the day a lot brighter. I blogged about how simple gestures can go a long way and I guess I was right, since this gesture someone else made to me on this day went a long way. To this individual, I thank you for being so awesome! Now it is my goal to do the same and see if I can spread this awesomeness around to others.

~:[CH2 - Day 57]:~ Delicious!!

~:[CH2 - Day 57]:~ Delicious!!

Today was quite the interesting day, as we headed to training for the entire day. While the quality of the training has been good, I still feel that we should be waiting to train until the social science standards are released. I hate to miss days of school when it's not necessarily needed. Regardless, I enjoyed myself and realized, I probably do need to get me a pair of glasses soon. During our lunch break, we went to Don Jose's as I feared, as while the food is good, I had made two trips in consecutive days! At practice, we ran intervals and I jumped in for two. Afterward, I realized how out of shape I was when I felt so lightheaded. Of course, I survived with a 2nd and 2nd :)

February 26, 2013 ~ The Depth of the Scars

"Scar tissue is stronger than regular tissue. Realize the strength, move on." - Henry Rollins

I've long looked deep inside to see the scars of the past. The areas where your wounds once laid open, spilling blood to the ground. While most of my scars were acquired one at a time, sometimes, I left myself vulnerable, allowing a second wound above another. I can recall the pain associated with each scar and could probably account for all that I lost with each, however, with each loss, I added a permanent memory to that, which is my life.

The scars of the past have molded me into something that I am not sure I would have become without the scars. The disappoints and failures, the broken hearts, the loss of loved ones, the sacrifices, and the rejections have each prepared me and given me the strength to face what the road ahead of me has waiting for me. The scars that I have collected are the only reason that my aspirations are as high as they are today and while the memory of each pains me, I know that I am stronger because of each.

However, what about the deepest scars? The scars that have left the mark closest to my heart and closest to my soul. The scars that formed from wounds that took months and even years to heal. A scar formed from something that you have wished you could have changed. Do those wounds every truly heal? Will the scars be that deep laceration that keeps tearing, not allowing yourself to find complete closure that most scars allow?

I often say that with each of my scars, there is a lesson to be learned and something that I can take from it and then move on. However, I am not true to myself when I say that. A few of these wounds linger and have lingered, never allowing itself to completely scar over and never really becoming stronger than before. No matter what you try to do - forget, move on, confess, sacrifice - that wound just will never heal. The depth of the wound is much too great and who knows how long it will be before it heals or ultimately it becomes what takes you from this place. 

I have some deep wounds that have yet to heal completely and a few deep scars that remind me each day of the pains of the past and I wonder, will it ever change? Will I be able to let go and move forward, allowing myself to move away from these marks that define me and these wounds that confine me. Will others look disgustingly at my wounds and turn their back or will there be someone who will see a wounded soul and be the heroine that saves me from the depths.

I believe that only someone who has suffered similar pains can relate. While it does not mean that others cannot connect with you, I feel that understanding the depths of a scar can only be felt by someone with scars of that depth. It is in that understanding that I find my purpose - to find someone who can understand, so that we both may help each other.

Each scar, represents something of our past and without the ability to collect these marks, our lives would be but a routine, a cycle. While not pleasant, these scars from the wounds that this world has inflicted upon us, are exactly what prepare us for what lies ahead. No one looks forward to earning these scars, but very few would sacrifice these scars they have gained. As it is in these scars, that one's true knowledge lies, as they will understand some of the many complexities of this world that challenge them to overcome obstacles that lay in their path.

I guess you can't be afraid of getting scars. It's something in life that is inevitable. It's a part of life. Without scars, you truly have not lived, as each of us is bound to find a time where we are wounded by what life has in store for us. By sheltering ourselves from the fear of the pain ahead, we only disable ourselves and leave us ill-equipped for the future. As while the pain of acquiring each scar may have been immense, it has helped us build up our pain threshold and arm us with the equipment to win the battles that lie ahead. While some of these scars will never cease to bring agony into our lives, they still have allowed us to learn, to see, to discover, and to experience. 

Four, five, six, seven ... the count of the scars move on. However, as each is counted, the scars do not disappear like the sound of each number spoken as they are counted. As while these words fade away into thin air, the scars of the past will always remain stronger than they were before, forever reminding us that who we are today is made up of all that we have experience on the road where we are today.

Cover up my scars? I used to. I used to hide them away so that no one could see them. Embarrassed that I had experienced such pain and trauma. However, overtime, I slowly have learned to cope with all of them, in hopes that they are my stepping stones to reach the peaks that I aim to reach. As while I journey ahead, I hope that I can find the one person who can truly understand the depth of my wounds and my scars, as it is in them that I will be able to find a way to cope and possibly finally close the wound that have plagued myself for so long. As it is in them that I will find the strength and courage to face something so deep that it tore at my heart and soul. It is then, and only then, that my wounds will truly heal and become as strong as I hope I know they can become.

~:[CH2 - Day 56]:~ A Good Part of the Day

~:[CH2 - Day 56]:~ A Good Part of the Day

Within these walls, I spend a good part of my day, everyday. In this organized chaos, I find my source of energy, a place that, while at times stressful, is an escape from the world around. When it is cold outside, it is warm inside, when warm outside, it is cool inside, when I am hungry, there is normally food, and when I am bored, there is definitely something to do. In this room, it is my job to shape the young minds of our program in hopes that they will find success on their road ahead. Yes, this is my classroom. It is my home away from home. Today, I spent the day just looking around before I headed out to practice. I thought of how much stuff I had, but realized, I wouldn't really change much. As I headed out, I felt the realities of the world fly at me, as the comfort and safety of my classroom was no longer. However, I still survived the day, a track district meeting, a pre-NYC meeting, as well as project meeting. I would have to say that the project meeting was quite fun, but it made me realize, I have a lot of practice ahead, right ????

~:[CH2 - Day 55]:~ Pescatarian

~:[CH2 - Day 55]:~ Pescatarian

Just kidding. Those who know me, know I probably wouldn't survive without my freedom to eat anything and everything, however, my meal was quite simple with salads and shrimp. It was simple but added a nice touch to the end of my day which was spend catching up on things including doing my laundry so I could pack AGAIN for New York. I realized I have already racked up 34,000 miles in points this year on a single airline and even more on JetBlue. It's kind of cool because I feel like a business traveler :) Regardless, it was nice getting to catch up, even though I did not quite get around to making this post until a day after. Oh well!

~:[CH2 - Day 54]:~ Heart & Soul

~:[CH2 - Day 54]:~ Heart & Soul
I have always been close with my family. As a young boy, my cousins would always take me places, we would eat with my grandfather and other family members, we would be greeting by family with traveling and so on. Thus, having moments like these, are priceless. Tonight was my parents' anniversary and it was ironic that it was the day I told my brother was the one game that I could go to. I could not imagine life without them as they are my heart and soul and every reason I have had the opportunities given to me until this point. They have always been there to support, to love, and just to have a great time with.

The game itself was a frustrating one as the referees were one of the worst I've experienced. Regardless, the Clippers pulled out the win and capped a great night. Of course, the picture with Clipper Darrell, the poster of Blake Griffin, and the bacon-wrapped sausage with all the toppings was not to shabby either! The day was just as great as we hosted our annual Security Council Conference  and Middle School Training MUN Conference. My students impressed me every more and have begun to speed up the process of development. While slower for some, every student I saw has begun to improve. It was great working with our staff of individuals as well! We also got a visit from the Superintendent and the School Board President.Unfortunately, because of all this, I missed Nalani's second birthday party :( ... I guess I will have to find a way to make up for that!

~:[CH2 - Day 53]:~ Family Ties

~:[CH2 - Day 53]:~ Family Ties

Tonight was Sadies. However, the day that preceded it was ridiculous. Between preparing for the Saturday conference, getting things for track, meeting with people in the front office, running grills, and also having practice, there wasn't much time to prepare for what was ahead. While a few thing did not go as planned, in the end, the night was a fun one with a great theme, a good crowd, and lots of moustaches. My pseudo-sister since high school is my co-advisor for the sophomore class and thus, we were there supervising and ultimately staying until the last person left 90 minutes after the dance ended! Regardless, it was still a good night and it seemed like others had a pretty good time as well! Boomers may not be the most amazing place ever, but with the right mindset, it ends up being  a pretty good night. Thank you to the best co-advisor and sister, for making this night a memorable one!

~:[CH2 - Day 52]:~ Once in a Blue Moon

~:[CH2 - Day 52]:~ Once in a Blue Moon
I'm definitely not a big drinker, but everyone in awhile, it's nice to sit down and just relax with a Blue Moon. Get it?? Regardless, after running errands for the conference, I ended up at Buffalo Wild Wings to enjoy a relaxing dinner and watch the game. Unfortunately Mary's Spurs got the best of us. I guess we'll have to wait until the next time to clinch the season series :) ... it was just another day, but a good one at that.

~:[CH2 - Day 51]:~ Like the High School Days

~:[CH2 - Day 51]:~ Like the High School Days

Maybe I dressed a little too high schoolish today, as too many students asked me about my clothes today. I guess it's a sign that maybe I should start shopping elsewhere. While I layered today, without the scarf, I probably would have died at practice, as the biting wind, got to me. In any case, it ended up being quite the long day, as I left school about 13 hours after I arrived. We held our final Nationals grill tonight and I changed it up, so it was tougher than the last day was in the past. The group needed to work, but in the end, they showed themselves ready for New York come next Saturday! Afterward, I survived the many questions of the parents, some of whom have not had their children leave them for this long or let them go this far before. It's always a big responsibility taking these students so far and I only pray that I will be able to protect them, while showing them a whole new world, my second home, which is New York City :)

February 19, 2013 ~ Giving Your Life

"Generosity is giving more than you can, and pride is taking less than you need." - Khalil Gibran

Tonight I attend a school board meeting that spotlighted our school's MUN program. This year marks our 30th year in existence with the first three years being as a club. There were two original advisors in the first few years who established the program and ensured that it would remain, both of whom I was lucky enough to have been taught by. 

While Linda Leventhal gave so much to our program to help establish it, as well as many other advisors in the past, my advisor, Richard Neville is one of the main reasons I currently am in the position I am in today. I've blogged about this before, but it's worth blogging about again, because without my experience with him, I would not be where I am today. Mr. Neville had a very strong personality and while he may not have gotten along with many people, he is the reason why our MUN program really flourished. I read stories about his push to get the district to look at Whitney HS because of its elitist atmosphere and how hard he worked to get the MUN program established at Cerritos HS. At the risk of creating enemies, he not only help mold the program at Cerritos HS, but also was a big part in the area's MUN program development. His drive and determination pushed our students to do the best they could and ultimately instilled in us, a work ethic that others would try to imitate but few could duplicate. However, it was not until he was diagnosed with cancer that I really saw him in his true light and it may have been the same time he saw himself in that light as well.

I guess things change when you know that your end is near. I still remember the day that he told us about it. In fact, I remember his exact words. He told our class, "The City of Hope told me that I had no hope." In that one line, my heart dropped. I did not know how to react. I did not have a lot of experience with losing people in my life and this was a difficult thing to deal with. As much fear as he struck into me freshman year when we misaligned the desks in his classroom, his stern nature is what made me better. It is what kept me pushing. Despite all the stress and pressure I felt because of him, I know how much he contributed to the betterment of my life.

It is then, I truly saw what giving your life for something was. Knowing his impending fate, he quickly searched for someone who could fill his shoes. He brought in a math teacher, Mr. Murray to help him throughout the first year, as he knew he could not continue lecturing on a daily basis. He also brought in Mr. Mustard, who currently serves as my colleague and kept the program alive and then raised the level at which it performed, despite not knowing what MUN was when he came into the program. However, most impressive was the fact that he spent as many days as he could with us. I could see the pain that he was in on a daily basis, yet that did not stop him from stopping by class or visiting committees during our annual Cerritos MUN Conference. 

I believe it was on January 25th of my senior year that he passed away. I did not have the heart to visit him as I did not know exactly what I would want to say to him. Looking back, I wish I did.  While I know he may now realize the impact he has had on my life, I wish I had the chance to tell him what it meant to me to see him as often as I did, despite the fact that he was facing the greatest battle of his life - for his life. 

How can I complain about anything? How can I not give all I can when someone so integral in my life gave me more than he could and took less than he needed? I have a long way to go to reach the heights that I saw with Richard Neville. I know that some may have a different perspective of him, but seeing him during his final year, I got to see something special. The stern, hard-casing cracked open and within that shell, you saw a heart of gold. The heart that put his life on the line so that this program could live forever. Who gave every breath so that many others who have come along after him could breath the same passion that he had for a program he gave every ounce of himself to.

Tonight, the school board thanked me for spending so much time for the program. However, in my heart, I know that I can work harder and today was a great reminder that I can do so much more. I know that I can pour so much more of myself into the causes I support and apart of including those wonderful people around me who deserve more, because on a daily basis they always take less than they need. I can't stand for that. To my parents, my brother, my family, my friends, my colleagues ... to the teachers, the soldiers, the humanitarians .... I thank you. You truly have poured so much into what you do and have have given me much more than I could ever need. You truly have built me a palace and lined my streets with all the gold I need through all the love and care you have selflessly given to all those around including myself.

Tonight I realized just how much more I can give. I realized the reason why I spend so much time on what I am doing and why I do what I do. Because of that, I know where I must go from here, as I have many things I need to fix and many more projects to take on. I see how that extra ounce of effort will help that one additional student, changing a life for the better forever. Each time I feel discouraged and unmotivated, I must crawl back to this post to remind myself, it is all worth it in the end, but only if I find myself giving more than I possibly can.

If you go to Google and  you type in "death of Richard Neville," you will only find information about Richard Neville, the 5th Earl of Salisbury or the 16th Early of Warick or even an Australian author of the 1900s. His name is not plastered on the walls of the Internet. He is not famed or revered by many. However, his life will never end and his spirit will never die. I cannot allow it. While Google may not have brought any search results to the forefront, my life is just one of my examples of how many lives he has impacted. My experiences with him demonstrated just how someone can give more than he has, his entire life, and take less than they need While writing this last paragraph it hit me why I did not find anything on Google. As the passing of Richard Neville did not signify his death, but was the beginning of the life of Richard Neville. As in giving his life to this program, he has changed the lives of so many, by having the opportunity to participate in a program that was his heart and soul. As his heart will continue to beat and his soul ever-present, as long as the program he poured everything into continues to live on, impacting the lives of so many because what he gave - everything.

~:[CH2 - Day 50]:~ Board of Approval

~:[CH2 - Day 50]:~ Board of Approval

Tonight our MUN program was spotlighted by the ABC Unified School District's Board of Education. After recovering from my trip to DC, trying to catch up on my first day back to work, and just trying to regain sanity, I tried to gather myself together for this meeting. I was able to finish my speech just before I left and introduced a stunning presentation by my four junior students who I will be taking to New York next weekend. I was so impressed by how this group handled themselves at the meeting and while I am used to them being so amazing, it was even greater to see them do it in front of the board members. Two former Cerritos MUN parents sat in the audience, while three former Cerritos MUN parents sit on the board of education, which made our job a lot easier. Regardless, I left the meeting tonight on such a high note and will use this to carry myself through the week. I am halfway through MUN season with Security Council & the middle school demo conference, Nationals (New York), and Berkeley upcoming for our teams. Let's see how it all goes!

February 18, 2013 ~ For Another

"True lovers don't give and take ... they give, and never expect to take anything back. Just like love, in every sense of the word." - Unknown

The world we live in is so engulfed with wealth and possessions that sometimes it does not allow us to see exactly what we need to do if we truly love someone. What are we willing to give up in order to ensure that the one we truly love is happy? How far are we willing to go to ensure that you are doing what you can to make them happy?

I had not intentions to write about this before today. However, as I was reorganizing my room, I came across a movie on Netflix called More Than Blue, a Korean foreign film that introduced us to two characters, K and Cream. (SPOILER ALERT - WHILE I TRIED TO CONCEAL AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE, I NEEDED TO GIVE SOME INFORMATION OUT IN ORDER TO WRITE THIS) Without giving too much away, K is doing all that he can to ensure that Cream is taken care of. Friends since high school, with both experiencing an orphaned childhood, their pain diminished when they find each other, as they help each other find peace in their lives after the death of their parents. K and Cream live with each other and work with each other, creating a strange and confusing relationship between the two. In the end, their relationship is one where they seem they could already be married; however, K does not allow his true feelings for her to be revealed since he is dying, as he feels that by doing so, he would leave her devastated (as was his mother when his father died). He does not allow her to find out that he is dying and tries his best to ensure that when he leaves, she is taken care of.

While protecting Cream, K also could be considered selfish for not allowing her to find out about his condition. Regardless, K gives Cream up, someone who is his whole world. I've seen situations like this throughout my life that, while not the same, required the same sacrifice. Sometimes you fall into a situation where you fall head over heals for someone, but you know that by allowing them to fall in love with you, you are leading them the wrong direction. You see that they are better off exactly where they are or that you cannot do all that you need to do to make this person happy.

I've often found myself entering a relationship and seeing it as a give and take. While this give and take happens, I feel that by focusing only on the give, you'll find yourself receiving so much more in return. I have felt the pain of giving someone up, knowing that I could not give them what they needed and while letting go was the hardest thing to do, looking back, I can't regret doing it. As I see it today, I feel that while I sacrificed everything we had, I feel that she now has more than I could have ever offered her at the time. While it may have been different now, at the time, I just was not ready for the cards that were dealt.

Sometimes you are not ready for the hand you are dealt. Some would say play anyway because you never know how things may work out. Others will fold those cards in hopes that something better will come the way of both involved. Most of us will not be in K's situation of an unavoidable death, but will be faced with the decision of whether to fold or to move forward seeing exactly what you can make out of the hand that you are dealt. At some point, you will have to take that risk, as very few hands that are dealt are perfect, however, when you decide to move forward, make sure that you are willing to go all in. As it is when you are willing to do this that you know you have found true love.

~:[CH2 - Day 49]:~ Welcome Home

~:[CH2 - Day 49]:~ Welcome Home

After a long eight days gone from the house, my JD always welcomes me home. She showed so much excitement when I walked it, it made it feel so good to be back right away! The time change has really affected my sleeping pattern as I woke up early and am so tired already! However, I made it through the day and even rearranged my room and began a new cleaning process to get my new room all setup! In any case, it's great to be home. I still got A LOT to do this week, but at least I'll be coming home at the end of each day.

~:[CH2 - Day 48]:~ Home, At Last

~:[CH2 - Day 48]:~ Home, At Last

I am home and I couldn't be happier.  I should be used to this hectic travel schedule, but I guess after all is said and done, I love being at home. However, I did have a very crazy and busy week with this group. We had a range of students within this group, but regardless of who they were, a lot of them took on committee situations that they were not used to and did what they could in there. The art of making assignments is very important and will ultimately make or break your delegation and the experience that each has. However, in every case, there can always be a learning experience. Nine of our twenty delegates were recognized for the weekend with one receiving a gavel, even with one of my best delegates being KOed (under the weather) from committee. More importantly, this group had the chance to spend a week together, traveling miles and miles by foot, navigating the DC metro, eating cupcakes galore, cooking up a storm, and ultimately dealing with all the ups and downs of the week. For some, today was their last conference. A few from this group will join our Berkeley delegation. Some will have three conferences in a span of five weeks. However, all of these students I am glad were part of this team - Georgetown 2013.

~:[CH2 - Day 47]:~ Hello World!

~:[CH2 - Day 47]:~ Hello World!

After a late night due to midnight sessions, I got ready and headed out. Today I got to see a new addition to my friends', Erika and Will, family - James. He was quite the lively boy and at such a young age, I felt that he had developed fairly quickly. It was great to catch up as always and I look forward to doing so again! I ended up buying our team cupcakes to keep them awake during the speaker. Our delegates flew through another day of committee and added with two great meals at Thaiphoon and Zorba's Cafe, the day was complete :)

~:[CH2 - Day 46]:~ Hoyasaxa

~:[CH2 - Day 46]:~ Hoyasaxa

I grew up wearing a Georgetown Hoyas shirt and shorts. I am not sure exactly how I got them, but I did. It always brings back memories when I visit, as I realize my history with the school. While slightly insignificant, the connection brings back memories of the past. Our team ventured out to the campus for a self-guided tour. We hit up a few buildings for one of our students who got into the school. After touring around, we headed down to M Street and Georgetown Cupcakes, before taking refuge in our hotel. I stopped by Panas Gourmet Empanadas, so delicious! Committee itself went well but the day was even better as we found a place called Teaism with bento boxes ~ great food! We ended the night with Buca di Beppo. While we had some good food, we ordered so much, as usual. However, the day did not end there as we escorted our team of seven crisis students where they held their crisis. What a long day, but well worth it all!

February 15, 2013 ~ The Smallest of Gestures

"Small gestures can have a big impact."
- Julianna Margulies

The smallest of gestures can go a long way. As I have toured myself through DC, doing a good deed, whether, holding open a door of an elevator, turning in a phone you found, or even a simple hello can go a long way and can sometimes create good karma. In many cases, they have been done for me, and I have been able to try and do a few myself. I've always wondered if we'd ever really be able to measure just how big of an impact a gesture may have. In my own eyes, I see how small gestures go a long way and while I realize it is impossible, I can still try to wonder just how big of an impact the efforts of someone making these gestures goes.

When thinking about it, I just think about the small gestures that have changed the way I go through my day. A positive gesture has put me in a better place and thus allowed me down a path that influences me to treat others better. Much like the idea of Pay It Forward, I feel that a small gesture can exponentially have a lasting impact that we will never know or see. Whereas a negative moment can do the same in the opposite direction. For each person we help or hurt, it impacts an exponential number of people each day ... (3^x) from 1 to 3 to 9 to 27 to 81 to 243 and so on.

On this trip, I've come across so many positive gestures that have made my days better and have done my best to not let the negative gestures affect me in the wrong way. Regardless, I know that I must try my best to continue to do as much as possible to ensure that the positive can win its battle against the negative. By taking a little time to write a positive note or send a positive text to someone or sending someone a gift for no reason, by speaking positive words about someone or simply by smiling; you have the power to make the life of someone else just that much more special without too much effort, as long as your efforts or message are true.

In the book, Why My Life Sucks, it talks about people who have drama in their lives and many times it's because they allow that drama to become part of their lives. When reflect backing, I've seen cases where I should have just dropped something and failed to let it go, only resulting in more headaches and problems than I started with. While in some cases, you must take a stand, I feel that by letting go of some of these smaller negative issues, you save yourself from spreading the negative exponentially. In fact, if you can find a way to turn that negative into a positive, you can easily reverse that trend and create a positive trend, much like the Liberty Mutual commercial where people were influenced to do a good deed or make a good gesture by witnessing someone else doing the same.

The gestures or deeds often are not pre-meditated, they can be anonymous, and you don't need to expect anything in return. While what you do may be minimal, those few moments could create a lasting impact on the life of someone else, whether positive or negative. Each moment we breathe, we must remember this and ensure that our actions reflect those of which we aim - having a positive influence in the lives of those around.

I know it will be trying at times to remain positive and continue to focus on passing on positive gestures and doing good deeds in hopes that those actions can continue to radiate amongst others around. Much like it takes one match to start a wildfire that can devastate an entire forest, a positive gesture can go along way in starting just the firestorm the world needs. While the negative cannot always be avoided, by making the effort to ensure that the positive outweighs the negative, I feel that we are on our way to having that big impact on this world.

Hopefully, we don't have to change much in our lives. However, we all have things we can adjust and I hope we do it for the betterment of mankind. As by adding one small gesture to our lives, we introduce another positive atom that will fill the world around with just what it needs to change for the better. I think I made an error when I said that doing something positive can create good karma, as we are the ones who set up the opportunities that may come our way, whether they are positive or negative. The environment we build around us and the mindset we use heading forward in life, ultimately lie on what we do on a daily basis, creating that "karma." The questions is will you have a negative impact on this world or use a simple gesture or deed to have a lasting impact on all those around. The choice, my friends, is yours.

~:[CH2 - Day 45]:~ My Heart in Your Hands

~:[CH2 - Day 45]:~ My Heart in Your Hands

Today was the day of hearts as I toured 20 students with one other chaperone through DC. I am lucky to have such a great group of students. We ventured down to Old Town Alexandria and then further down to Mt. Vernon before finishing up our memorial tour and then heading to committee for the first day. While there was some drama at the conference (not with our delegation), the day went pretty well. As always, I want to thank all my wonderful friends, family, colleagues and more who make my every day special and who I would give the love in my heart to in a second. While they may be someone I give my entire heart to, I hope to give each of you a piece of my heart to show you just how much you mean to me. On that night, I bid you goodnight! (Blog Post On Valentines - http://wutanabe.blogspot.com/2013/02/february-14-2013-love-at-its-finest.html)

February 14, 2013 ~ Love at Its Finest

"'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."
- Alfred Lord Tennyson

It's easy to say this at certain times, while at others, you feel as if "love" is exactly what got you miserable. Whether a long distance relationship was just too difficult, the timing of one just wasn't right, whether you were just not compatible or something else of the sort that kept you from keeping the love that you sought. After all of it, do you feel you were better?

Each relationship I have had I have learned a lot. Not just about the people I have gone out with, but about myself. I learn more about my flaws have have worked to try and fix the flaws that I made. I look back in the past and realize just how I messed up, moved on, knowing that I cannot live in the past and maybe one day, another opportunity will present itself. As each experience has left me a better person, thus, maybe Lord Tennyson was right.

However, on this day celebrating St. Valentine (whichever story you believe), it needs to continue to be about the love of not two people, but of all of us. We hear of lovers' quarrels, of attacks on workplaces and schools, and even suicides and the lack of love can be one of the factors that plays a role in these issues. I don't want to begin a political discussion and I am not saying it is the only reason, but today is a day that we must BEGIN thinking about spreading love to others.

First, I, like many others I know, love to make Valentines about spreading love to those around me who have made life special. Each of you have a special place in my heart and I feel that without you, I definitely would not be "better," as Lord Tennyson refers to. Thus, to my family, friends, colleagues, and even strangers, thanks for spreading love into my life and into the lives of others, making this words a better place.

Additionally, Valentines Day has been commercialized as this day that two people celebrate their love for each other, but in my eyes, this can be a daily thing. Growing through the pains of so many rough heartbreaks, I've realized, if I need a holiday such as this to remind me to celebrate, I may not have exactly the type of relationship that I want and I need to do better to make sure the relationship is maintained. I probably will still get caught up in the whole idea of it, however, I do want to make sure I don't drop the ball and ignore someone who I want to or will spend the rest of my life with.

To everyone, I hope you have a wonderful Valentines Day and I hope we do all that we can to make sure that we spread the love to all those around by taking a second out of our day to say those three precious words, I love you! You never know what those three words or those few seconds of spreading love will do in the life of someone close to you. To me, each of you have given an extra beat to my heart and have allowed my soul to soar and for that I thank you.

I love you all!

~:[CH2 - Day 44]:~ In the Shot

~:[CH2 - Day 44]:~ In the Shot

Today it rained and cut our day short, but regardless, we were able to make it through most of our tours. We started the day meeting with Linda Sanchez. After a great meeting, we headed to the Supreme Court, then to the Library of Congress. Starving, we headed to the Longworth building for lunch then over to the Capitol to watch the Senate in action. After an extensive security check, we headed on our memorials tour, which was cut short by rain. We were able to hit up the Washington monument, the World War Memorial, the Korean War Memorial and the Lincoln Memorial. In the even, we hit up the Pizzeria Paradiso for an awesome dinner and bonding night. Exhausted, we should be in good shape tomorrow. In my shot is my partner in crime for the week, helping me chaperone the kiddies. Olivia's done a great job, except for the attempted mutiny today :) 

~:[CH2 - Day 43]:~ Just Hanging Around

~:[CH2 - Day 43]:~ Just Hanging Around

A morning departure was strange with barely anything on me, as we were allowed only the minimum while on the White House tour. We got to walk through the East Wing of the White House and it was definitely something to remember. While there were no Obama sightings, it was a great experience going back through. After walking around for awhile, I enjoyed the Kabob House. We rushed to the Pentagon after and while we had a few mishaps on the way, we still managed to BARELY make our tour. I ran into the Pentagon right before our tour time. While we got yelled at for being late, we made it. On another part of a rushed day, we got back and had about half an hour to get ready for dinner, which ended up being pretty good. Afterwards, we headed to watch our play, which was intriguing as always, as the mystery of who that actor was still exists within our Georgetown team. I guess you all will never know! The Kennedy Center had an amazing art piece in it made of dress shirts - so awesome!

~:[CH2 - Day 42]:~ City Center

~:[CH2 - Day 42]:~ City Center

We ventured to the city center, which is the Capitol Building after a trip to the National Mall in the morning. We were able to take the Senator's subway into the Capitol, the oldest subway in the city! Our tour was great and our tour guide told such a touching story about her experience on 9/11 that left me forever a better person. We also got gallery passes for both the House and Senate, which we will use later this week. We rushed through the Newseum after a delicious lunch and while it is one of my favorite places, we had to breeze through it due to time. We hit up the National Archives and then the ice skating rink, as the students definitely looked fatigued after the first full day. We cooked dinner tonight and while my chicken did not turn out that great, it still was okay. For movie night, the boys did not like the movie we picked, but they were outnumbered by the girls and lost. Regardless, after a long night of doing dishes and cleaning up, I can finally say, it's time for bed. A great opening first day, here's to a few more!!

~:[CH2 - Day 41]:~ Slice of Life

~:[CH2 - Day 41]:~ Slice of Life

Today was quite the travel day. After eating a solid breakfast, I did not eat until this slice of pizza saved me from starvation. We left early this morning and headed from LA to Charlotte. Our flight was delayed and added some extra stress for us making the connection. However, a "situation" on board slowed us down even more. A passenger on the plane was not listening to the flight attendant and was being questioned after we deplaned. He was standing most of the flight and went to the restroom after being told to sit down. Quite the adventure. We did not have time to hang around, however, as we bolted to our gate across the airport, making it just as they were boarding. Ultimately, we ended up in DC, taken around by a driver who seemed completely lost, and grabbed pizza at Alberto's before calling it a night. I'm exhausted from traveling and surviving on pocky sticks, beef jerkey, hi-chew, and the granola bar from Olivia, thus, I wish you all adieu!

February 10, 2013 ~ Speak Your Mind

"I speak my mind. If it offends some people, well, there's not much I can do about that. But I'm going to be honest. I'm going to continue to speak my mind, and that's who I am." - Jesse Ventura

"Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret."  - Ambrose Bierce

I've always wondered what life would be like if we knew everything that everyone was thinking. I'm actually pretty good at figuring out the thoughts of some people, but what if there was a bubble over everyone's head and you could see exactly what they were thinking, all the time? I guess it could almost be like the movie, What Women Want. In the movie, Mel Gibson can hear the inner-most thoughts of all the women around him. It drives him crazy, at first, however, he uses it to his advantage, but then also learns a lot from it.

Some people could care less about what they say and who it impacts, like the quote from Jesse Ventura who said that he really doesn't care about what others think, as he is going to speak what is on his mind. At the same time, most will warn you not to speak to hastily, especially when you are angry, as the words you speak, you can never take back and the lasting affect of those words could be tremendous.

I know what you are thinking (or do I?). What type of creep would want to see the inner-most thoughts of people? Would the world be boring if that were to happen? Or even, how cool would that be??? 

Regardless of where you stand on this, I always find that I am always wrong at trying to read someone when it is important. It's almost as if I were to wear glasses every day and normally look at a person with perfect 20/20 vision, being able to figure out exactly what they wanted to say. However, whenever an important moment arrived, my glasses fell off, or the lens popped out, or I lost my glasses. In all cases, my vision seems to be impaired when it really counts and it has made life a lot more difficult. 

Ultimately, my struggles have brought me to this thought. What if  this were to happen? Would we be more careful of thinking bad things and ultimately create a better world? Would we be able to help people who needed to be helped? Would we see people around us in a different light? Would there be less corruption, backstabbing, and manipulation in the world? All these things are interesting and something we will never know. 

I guess instead of just hoping to know what someone was thinking, I should just live with the fact that we were really never meant to know and that it's exactly what makes life worth living. It makes life dramatic, but also interesting where great surprises can change someone's lifetime forever. A bubble over our heads? What was I thinking? I may just want to walk over and pop that idea.

(VLOG ~ Speak Your Mind Coming Soon!) 

~:[CH2 - Day 40]:~ Good For a Meal

~:[CH2 - Day 40]:~ Good For a Meal

 It was a pretty good day as I had a balance of friends and family, while preparing for my trip tomorrow. In the morning I headed out to pick up Shannon from the airport for a surprise visit home! With a Jamba Juice in hand, we surprised her mother and I know it will be a great Lunar New Year Celebration for them! I was able to catch the end of Makoa's game and he almost got his last shot to go! Regardless, he still enjoyed the game and grabbed a bite to eat at Fantastic where we got two more items from their crane game (my addiction). After some final packing and button making, I was able to get some additional work done before heading off to Wurstkche ... I have been able to eat every animal they have including veal, park, turkey, chicken, beef, buffao, duck, crocodile, rattlesnake, rabbit, lamb, and now pheasant. It's quite the interesting place :) We celebrated Jinny's birthday but I had to turn in early to get all my paperwork done. Now, while I have a few last minute things to do, I am all packed and ready to go and may just sleep earlier than normal. Quite an awesome day and I look forward to what this week will bring!

February 9, 2013 - Becoming Nomadic

"I love traveling. I love just going about on my own, feeling I have no roots." - Tom Jenkinson

What is it about traveling that entices people so much? Why do people love to travel from place to place, knowing the headaches that can ensue? Why do we travel so much when we return from a vacation, we hope we can find a vacation to our vacation?

I've asked myself these questions as I have traveled around the country while also keep on top of my job. In January alone, I traveled 6,800 miles in January and 19,817 miles in the last three months including the trip I will be taking next week. While I know there are some people who travel more, the mere idea of covering this much mileage is mind-boggling and it's not something I ever thought I would do. However, I do it; the question is, why?

I've found myself traveling in large groups of 60, in smaller groups of 2-5, and also by myself. I love the freedom and independence of traveling alone and the ability to experience whatever I want without consulting someone else, however, I also find working with others in making a decision and sharing these moments with them are priceless. In all cases, however, I found that the memories created in each experience go unmatched. Living in one region, growing roots, and never leaving can be boring. However, while exhausting, the exhilaration of visiting a new city or place is truly unmatched. The adventures of finding new places to eat, meeting new people, seeing new and different environments, and simply enjoying what a city has to offer, have given me lessons in life that I will never forget. Seeing different parts of the country, you get an idea that where you live is but a small sample of what is around us in this world. Each city you visit has its own flavor and has something to offer such as the attractions of Orlando, a, the mountains of New Mexico, the plains of Omaha, the lights of New York, and the craziness of Las Vegas. Each has something that other areas do not have and for that I encourage others to see these things for themselves.

For me, traveling is a way of life. I refuse to sit still, as staying in one spot may only mean one thing to me for now, a slow and torturous death. The faster I move, the more energy I have and the further I progress, as with each step I take, I move one step closer to what I am aiming for. Traveling has introduced me to people I never thought I would have met, showed me places I never knew about and most importantly, fed me a meal that showed me what I have been missing.While in most cases I enter each trip with a plan, something unexpected always arises, which leaves its imprint on my life forever.

Eventually, I will allow my groups to anchor into the soil and start a family, however, much like the changing of the seasons, I will not allow myself to stop. I will do my best to ensure that the lessons I have learned while traveling are passed on to my family so that they can fly free much like the leaves that fall off the branches each winter. As while there are so many great things in the world, there is no greater feeling that soaring the through sky, not knowing what adventures are awaiting you when you arrive.

I don't think I could put into words why I love to travel so much, but I guess it's something that you just have to pull your roots out of the ground and give a try every once in awhile. Pack your bags, grab your boarding pass, and don't miss your flight. As while anchoring yourself will provide stability in your life, each trip you take will be just one more branch to add to the portrait that is you and your life.

~:[CH2 - Day 39]:~ Saying Goodbye

~:[CH2 - Day 39]:~ Saying Goodbye

Teaching and coaching can often be the worst job simply because every year you say goodbye. You say goodbye to a group, not knowing whether or not they will ever cross back into your life despite them growing in the four years you knew them. While a few special ones come back, on a night like this, it could be the last time that you really have a chance to say goodbye. Tonight was our last regular season home game and could be my last game of the season, as I fly off to DC tonight. It was great to see a wonderful crowd and we had an amazing end to an interesting season. Sunday, we find out our draw for CIF, however, as for tonight, I will cherish this day and the last four years with these seniors, as well as the girl seniors. I also saw the growth of another one of my students, who signed her college letter of intent today. It was amazing to be a part of the signing and am so proud of her for this next big step. While saying goodbye may have been the theme, I also had time to catch up with a few people today. It's always nice when you can find that time and realize just how amazing the people around you are ... the seniors, the students, your friends, and your colleagues. Thank you :)

~:[CH2 - Day 38]:~ Getting' Hot in Here

~:[CH2 - Day 38]:~ Getting' Hot in Here

It got hot in the MUN room tonight from 5-9pm, as our juniors gathered for our second group grill session together. Each year, our juniors go to New York for the National High School Model UN Conference and this year, we selected a team of 45 juniors. While some schools have students who return to this conference or even cross-grade "all-star" groups, we rely on developing a full class so that one group gets a grade-level trip together that they'll never forget! The process is stressful and tough, however, in the end, I find that these juniors grow a lot as delegates and people through the process. The students have already compiled over 600 pages of writing for the conference and nearly 10,000 articles as a group! This was the end of my marathon day, but it was well worth it and by days end I left with more energy that I started with. While I have DC coming first, New York is less than 30 days away ~ 23 to be exact.

February 6, 2013 ~ The Tough Road

"Your difficulties will strengthen you."

I've long been a fan of fortune cookies. Not only does the cookie sit well with me, but I also like to image that the fortune is of great importance and that every word of it may come true. While I have grown up from those days, I still get eager to open my fortunate cookie each time I open.

One of the latest fortunes I read, I tucked deep into my pocket, only to discover. "Your difficulties will strengthen you." If I read this fortunate a few years ago, I probably would have tossed it. When I think back I was miserable. Not in all facets of my life, but in ones that were important to be. I kept digging trying to find a way out, only to find myself in a bottomless pit of my own doing. At that point, I saw no strength gained by my struggles, only misery.

Depression was not a word that I would be used to describe my state, it was more of unhappy, however, as I look back, I think about how silly my thought process was. How the important at that time seems quite unimportant now. How the large stain on my past slowly washed away as if it never existed.

"Your difficulties will strengthen you." Hitting fast-forward to 2013, it is now a fortunate I would tuck away for a difficult day. Previously, I was too close to everything I was involved with and never took the time to step back to see just how small my problems were compared to the bigger picture and how ultimately, my experiences did make me stronger.

Life in some facet of our lives, will not be easy. We are bound to struggle, to suffer, to cry, to feel pain, and to find ourselves on empty. However, we will also find ourselves laughing, cheering, celebrating success, and loving life. One of these things is unlikely without the existence of the other, that's how the world finds its balance, thus accepting that, is our first step to understanding that regardless of where it falls, ultimately our experiences will allow us to grow.

We will fail. Our hearts will be broken. We will stress ourselves out. We will experience death, but we will also experience life. We will come across breakthroughs. We will love. Ultimately, we will succeed.No matter what difficulties we face on this road of life, we must keep in mind that ultimately that each of these experiences that are going to prepare us for the life that is ahead of us. It will allow us to be battle-tested and knowledgeable; smart enough to handle any situation that is thrown our way. While events in our life may leave us defeated, these difficulties will only allow our potential to grow. It will allow us to become stronger than we have every thought possible, but only if we allow ourselves to.

In my youngest stages, I did not understand what the fortunate was. A few years later, I could barely read what the fortunate said.  After a few more years, I had trouble understanding it. While I have accomplished all the previous, I still find myself struggling to believe in it. However, in each stage of my life I have struggled, but day after day, year after year, and soon, decade after decade, hopefully I will be fortunate enough to step back and see the view from the highest peaks as I retire high above the rest who let their difficulties become the reason that they never reached the top, while I used those difficulties allow myself to gain what I needed to ascent to pinnacle.

"Your difficulties will strengthen you." How sweet it is.

~:[CH2 - Day 37]:~ Amazing in a Box

~:[CH2 - Day 37]:~ Amazing in a Box

I had a very good day at work today as my class had an amazing simulation that the students loved which was followed by a solid practice where we got a lot accomplished. However, little did I know that the best part of the day was soon to come! I was so excited to receive a box in the mail from the musician Priscilla Ahn! I previously had sent her my poetry book and supporter her efforts and in exchange received a wonderful post card, signed CD, and a very cute and beautiful craft. While Priscilla has displayed her amazing musical talents through all of her CDs and work, I was glad to see the other skills she possessed in the area of crafts! She has truly been an amazing person who is easy to talk to and connect with and combined with her other talents, it makes her an incredible talent that everyone should go out an support! I've always believed that people need to keep inspiring each other and supporting each other and I hope that the people of this world can continue to see what a little effort on their part can do for the world around. Priscilla has inspired me through her work and I hope I can repay a bit of that favor. This was truly, amazing in a box! 

~:[CH2 - Day 36]:~ Domolicious!!

~:[CH2 - Day 36]:~ Domolicious!!

I got intrigued by bento box making last year and have been planning to make a feast of things. While I did not do as well of a job on this one as I had hoped, I think people can figure out exactly what it is. The main dish is a kimchi hamburger domo with siracha mayo over picked vegetables (grass and flowers) and tamago (background). Also included is pork shumai, sliced pork belly with quail eggs, and assorted sashimi with an ume rice ball rolled in furukake. It ended up tasting pretty good and I had pretty fresh ingredients. It definitely is something that I would make again and ended up making enough to have for dinner three nights in a row :) ... while the bento box lunch was amazing, so was our win tonight over Artesia. In a defensive battle, we pulled out a 39-31 victory and clinched the last playoff spot! It was such a close game and our athletes really did what it took today to take this victory.

~:[CH2 - Day 35]:~ Monkey See, Monkey Do

~:[CH2 - Day 35]:~ Monkey See, Monkey Do

There's never a dull moment with Dylan. While he was crying most of the time, I got him to calm down and enjoy our time together by making weird faces and taking pictures of us. Needless to say, we ended up in a rhythm and almost in sync. The day itself was pretty normal, as I caught up on things and got used to a quiet first period to myself. While I finished up reservations for my trip to DC this weekend, I found myself spending time working on a bento box for a little competition. I guess I am quit the competitive person and spent a few hours piecing something together. In the end, I am somewhat proud of what I created but know I have more skills than what I created :P ... you'll have to wait until tomorrow to see what I made.

~:[CH2 - Day 34]:~ Gliding Through

~:[CH2 - Day 34]:~ Gliding Through
Photography Provided by KatHuey!

I promised I would cheat today and I did. Thanks to Kat, I used our group photo from our KHS Ice Skating night as today's photo, even though it was yesterday. However, today was just as graceful as we were on the ice as I caught up on a few things, but mostly just gliding through the day, watching sports, eating and getting my hair cut. It's nice to have one of these every once in awhile and allows you time to catch up with whoever. In any case, the Superbowl ended up being a pretty good game, but long because of the blackout and it was interested to see how the game ended. My mom is pro and was able to win with one of her squares and another friend really hit it big with the Ravens winning. Well, I did not have much invested in the game, so I could have cared less, however, it still ended up being a pretty good game even though I vowed not to watch it. It's now time to start packing and planning, as it's less than one week from my departure from the west coast. The good news is that there will be some days with projections of 50 degrees. The bad news is the other days :P

Yoo Jae Suk (Gangnam Style) Photoshoot

Photos by Adam Hanson - December 2012

~:[CH2 - Day 33]:~ Surf City USA

~:[CH2 - Day 33]:~ Surf City USA

Waking up early on a Saturday was easier than expected as a before-the-alarm wake up occurred, allowing myself plenty of time to get ready. As I did, I got on my normal Harry Potteresque attire and headed out the door to head with our large group to the second day of the Surf City Conference.  While I had to squash a few problems, we ended up with 49 awards including 10 gavels and a best large school award. I also saw a number of students who improved in their performances and the way they researched and focused on their topics. It was definitely a great prep for our tough schedule of Georgetown/Santa Barbara and Nationals/Berkeley split weekends with our freshman SC and middle school conference mixed in between. Afterward, I took a nap on the long ride home due to a car chase, before heading out on an adventure. I hit up Tampopo Ramen before going to KHS Ice Arena. While we had a blast with my friends, the rink closed earlier than it was listed, which was upsetting. We ended up heading out to Tra Teahouse and had a great night out. 

*I guess tomorrow I may end up cheating and talking more about ice skating, since I'm getting our group photo tomorrow :D That will be my daily picture since I'm getting it tomorrow :D

~:[CH2 - Day 32]:~ Truly Sweet

~:[CH2 - Day 32]:~ Truly Sweet

Today was truly sweet, as it was a student free day and felt like a ghost town on campus. When I went, I was able to go to a quiet classroom and not worry about anything but checking out a few things and making sure things were in order. I also was able to catch lunch with a Cerritos-based crew at Which Wich, with a stop at Bristol Farms, Sprinkles, and Lette. While I am not a sweets person, it's always fun picking up things suck as this for others. The macaroons we picked up were so colorful and wonderful. It was great catching up with a few people that I haven't seen in a while. Today was also staff appreciation night at the game and it was great seeing so many people at the game supporting! We pulled out a great win and celebrated with Lucille's with two free rounds for the Ts :) ... I also got a wonderful drawing for my poetry book by a talented young artist (Jessie) and I also began creating a few things for another talented artist/entertainer (Kavi). What a truly sweet and spectacular day to start the wonderful weekend ahead!